Sleep

There is something truly wonderful about sleep. In the last two weeks, for whatever reason, my body doesn't want to let me sleep. I will be fighting to stay awake all day and as soon as I hit the pillow I lie there tired for hours, not sleeping.

Last night, although it took me almost 2 hours to fall asleep, and I didn't get the eight hours a I wish I could have, I slept. Out cold. I usually wake up 2-3 times during the night and that is a good nights sleep for me. But last night, after falling asleep I stayed asleep.

The funny part was falling asleep. I called my sister after an hour and a half almost in tears because I was so tired and I couldn't sleep. She was trying to get me to focus and figure out how to meditate or something. But it was when I started talking about the completely random things that I started calming down.

They were truly pointless things, like how I think the bacon in my fridge has probably gone bad and that makes me really sad. Or how I love the music video for "White Houses" by Vanessa Carlton. How i woke up and my bread was moldy, so now I need more bread. How scrambled eggs sound good. She kept trying to stop me from wandering, it was finally when I said, "this is actually helping" that she said "okay".

Then after a few minutes she said good night. (I think I was starting to put her to sleep). I at first tried to see if there was a way to sing myself to sleep. But that took way to much concentration. So i started just kind of talking out loud. I'm not sure if it was a prayer or what. I was just talking about my day. Slowly I started mumbling a little more and getting quieter. Next thing I know my alarm is going off.

Sleep is such a thing to be happy about. I wish I had more control over mine. But it's what it is. If sleep comes easy to you, smile. It's a gift.